Jesus, the Yankees are little bitches

Dammit, every time there's someone whining like a little bitch in the majors, they are wearing pinstripes. First they get all pissed because a Rays player plays baseball — bowls over the catcher — and next, Shelley Duncan Is A Little Bitch, part of the frat-boy-fuckhead duo (Giambi is the other member, bro), takes out Akinori Iwamura on purpose, because he wants to "match their intensity." As if they meant to hurt anyone, you second-generation baseball freak. Then your pitcher throws at their top prospect and gets chucked from the game. You going to complain about that, Girardi?

This is nothing new, of course. Remember when the Yankees bitched about Ken Huckaby sliding into Derek Jeter on Opening Day? Right, because you're not supposed to play hard then, either. Or the time the Yankees wanted the Rays to forfeit because they were late getting to Yankee Stadium after a fucking hurricane? When the Yankees, a month before, had left Baltimore early because of — you guessed it — a hurricane? Or the time they complained their asses off after the Red Sox decided they wanted to, you know, play baseball on a wet day at Fenway? The horrors. We know how that turned out. Fuckheads.