Week In Review

We kicked off the season, Japan-style.
Ben talked about his favorite player, the Great One, Roberto Clemente.
Then we kicked off the season again, and I spent 10 straight hours watching (non-Sox) baseball.
Oh, and Alexa Rodriguez got attacked in Fenway. By a hawk.

It's just too good.

Baseball and breakfast reheated for dinner

A mere 14 hours later, and I am settling in to watch the Sox face the Athletics in Game 1 of the 2008 campaign. Hopefully my MLB TV will be more cooperative than DirecTV. So far, so good. Still debating whether to mute Thorne and Phillips. Right now their voices are on, but ever so softly.

That's the one thing that bugs me about the MLB TV, no control over which broadcast I get. Those Rays' series with Joe Magrane doing color are a source of great distress. But, if nothing else, listening to the opposition's announcers throughout the season should provide a steady flow of blog fodder. Perhaps I'll get power rankings going for play-by-play and color guys. Scully sits atop both.

As Papi pops out in the first I see there is a Konami sign in left field. Makes me think of Double Dribble. That's pleasant.

Phillips is talking about how Manny is in the best shape of his life. Mute.

Thorne just said (I didn't really mute) this series is a homecoming for A's catcher Kurt Suzuki. Is this accurate? He was born in Hawaii, went to college in California, and played for Team USA in the qualifying tournament for the 2008 Olympics. I know what Thorne meant, but I'm not so sure he knows what he meant.

Anyway, no need to blog the early part of the game. It's already been done. The Red Sox won. Brandon Moss came up large but he's still headed to Pawtucket because Kielty's potency against lefties is nice to have on the bench.

My goodness, Dice-K looks dreadful. I can't wait for the part where he settles in. Please tell me that comes soon. At this point (sacks full, one out, no control) I'm amazed he only gave up two runs in the first.

OK, I'll stop! I leave you with this:

Rise and shine, campers

It's 6:08 a.m. and it's on for a three-inning live blog.

6:09: JD Drew has already been scratched.

6:10: Strike to littly Dusty and we're on! Then LITTLE DUSTY SINGLES UP THE MIDDLE, and now the Japanese fans are "Youk"-ing!

6:12: Youk grounds out, Pedroia to second, Papi up. Watch your heads. Popout. Man-ny. Man-ny. The first hint of sunlight over here. Manny fouls out. Dice-K time.

6:18: T-Buck time. Grounds to LITTLE DUSTY and he's out. Then Mark Ellis hits the absolute crap out of the ball, homer to left center, 1-0 A's. And all of a sudden Dice-K cannot find the strike zone, and I'm quite a bit more tired than I was 10 minutes ago.

6:22: Jack Cust, the legend, is hit by a pitch. Then there's a wild pitch. And Emil Brown walks (on a full count, at least), loading the bases. Looked to me like Bobby Crosby just struck out, but they didn't get the call. On the next pitch Crosby bounces back to somewhere not all that near the pitcher and Dice-K makes a silly play to get him at first and it's 2-0. Restart! Nevermind, strikeout, and its Mikey Lowell time. One inning in the books!

6:35: Single for Mikey-poo. Brandon Moss is up. He's no Randy Moss. Fielder's choice and Moss is on first, so I'm looking for the stolen base. Oakland gets a little DP therapy on the grounder to short. Now I'm REALLY tired. I'm going to have some coffee and some of the $40 worth of breakfast food I bought yesterday.

6:42: Kurt Suzuki hits a single to center, giving us our first Jacoby sighting of the year. He fields it exquisitely, like The Natural. Ryan Sweeney flies out to right. Travis Buck strikes out by Suzuki steals second. Varitek's throw ain't great but we get our first Lugo sighting. Dice-K's first strike to Mark Ellis is an awesome fastball. He's dealing now... straight into a full-count walk.

6:53: Get your crazy on. Throw down some sake bombs. Tavarez is warming up. Another full-count walk leading straight into Jack "Pedro Cerrano" Cust with Dice-K only throwing fastballs and his new change-up. Cust is swinging like Robb Deer. Cust strikes out looking.

6:58: I just took a tape recorder out of my bag to do some work and my bag smells like Trident Watermelon Twist gum. Holy crap, I have a lot of transcribing to do.

7:01: JACOBY. Strikes out looking. But Lugo singles. This is the year. LITTLE DUSTY shows off some opposite-field warning track power, which is promising despite the out. Youk grounds it to the far side of third and Jack Hannahan gets it but can't get Youk out, which is dangerous for everyone involved for Papial purposes. Ortiz watches the first strike like it's nothing and eventually rocks it — right into the shift. We'll take the solid contact, I guess.

7:10: Dice-K comes out for the final half-inning of your live blog (sorry kids). Emil Brown aims to make it a quick one by popping to Youk, who drops it, equaling his error total from last year. Wow, that was unexpected. And a lie. Youk caught it. Sidney Bubba Bobby Crosby grounds back to Dice-K and he's out. Full count to Jack Hannahan, and a walk.

7:18: Kurt Suzuki lines out to a leaping LUGO! That's it for me. Work and breakfast beckon. Enjoy the next 161 and two-thirds. Baseball season.

No Country For Old Young Men

We're in the home stretch, campers. Tomorrow's game won't be for the young and weak, who need their beauty rest; it will be for the strong, those who arise at 6 every day to soak in the life-affirming rays of the sun rather than stay up until 1 or 2 being poisoned by the life-sucking glow of the television. Tomorrow will be a day for the old guys. Let's act appropriately.

I will not be going to Professor Thom's, a bar in Manhattan's East Village, which is throwing a massive "Private Party" at the hour of six because it is not legally allowed to be open at that hour. I am on Thom's mailing list, however, and entered a Red Sox haiku contest to celebrate the opener:

The alarm clock rings
It's 6 and the Sox are on
Praise f*cking Jesus

I actually starred it out on the email. I'm getting better. Though it should be:

The alarm clock rings
It's 6 and the Sox are on
Please pass the sake

14 hours to go.

It's about fucking time I posted something

Hi. I'm the other guy who does the blog. As I've had a rare run of professional work to do, and Scrabulous to play, I've been absent lately as Ben has been putting it down like a vintage Timmy Wake, all quality, all the time, to the tune of 18 posts in a row. '95 and '98 TW, to be specific. Timmy dubs was the shit. (Top Gun style: "He was a good man." "He still is a good man." "That's what I meant.") That was back in high school, I'm 30 now, and the Sox can sign him until he's 55, if they so please, at $4 million per. If Dikembe can do it, why not Wake?

The most astonishing thing about Timmy is that he didn't even start with the Sox. He pitched in the 1992 NLCS for the Pirates as a rookie. I don't remember him pitching per se, but I remember that series. Those Pirates teams were awesome. Ah yes, nostalgia. While we're on this particular block of memory lane, let's take a moment to remember Tom Brunansky, and that time he hit five home runs in the last three games of the season. That was freaking fantastic.

Shit, while we're on bookends, and as we approach Opening Day, let's also remember the time Jack Clark hit a grand slam in the opener against Toronto. I had a half day for that game and got home in time to see that home run: holy crap, I can't remember any time — and I'm going to use a writer's term here — that the season seemed so pregnant with possibility. Yeah baby, preggers. Bring on game two!

With Opening Day now eight days away, let's put this to a vote: how many of you are going to get up to watch the game? As I just (re-)entered the 20th century by acquiring cable television in my own home, I'll be on ESPN2 at 6 a.m. Tuesday. Wednesday... probably not so much. But seriously, who's watching?

This is all very strange

Okay, so we knew that the Red Sox were opening against the A's on March 25th and 26th in Japan. That's the regular season kickoff, airing live at 6:05 a.m. both days. Mmmm, mmm, that sounds fun. Anyway, after that the Sox are off to L.A. The regular season having started, you figure we're having a few games against the Dodgers just to knock some of those inter-league bitches off our schedule.

Well, that's what I figured, anyway. But I was wrong.

Turns out we're playing the NL Central this year anyway. But seriously, starting the regular season, then pausing it, then starting again? Is this Russia?

(Speaking of Russia, Obama girl has nothing on this "I want a man like Putin" song, put out by a couple of Russian pop vixens. We should remix it for "I want a man like Papi." It would be FAN-tastic.)

Ben: Kooky logistics? Sure. But here's the great news: "All ticket proceeds for the game will benefit ThinkCure, the official charity of the Los Angeles Dodgers. ThinkCure is dedicated to raising funds for critical cancer research and ultimately finding a cure for cancer. " 115,000+ will be in attendance at the Coliseum. A few dump trucks of dough for cancer and a new MLB attendance record? So worth it.

Bryan: Right, but here's my point:

a) Playing the games in Japan is not "regular."
b) The games are "regular-season" games.
c) Playing the Dodgers in the Coliseum for charity is also "not regular."
d) These are "exhibition games."

So why aren't both sets either "regular season" or "exhibition" games? Given that there are "kooky logistics" involved no matter what, I'd like a little order to my kookyness. Even if that's an inherent contradiction, BENJAMIN.

Ben: It's quite simple, the Dodgers games were added after the trip to Japan was already scheduled. Obviously MLB wants to open the season in Japan with "regular season" games to add to the spectacle. Plus, to travel that distance only to play games that don't count would make it all the more ridiculous, no? So then once you return if the choice is between not playing at all for five days before Opening Day or hanging out in L.A. to play three exhibition games while you recover from jet lag, I'll take the latter. (It would seem that making both series "regular season" is off the board because, as you say, the Sox play the NL Central this year.)

Bryan: You're a towel.